Glossary entry (derived from question below)
Russian term or phrase:
Она в предчувствии любви (whole phrase)
English translation:
Her mind ablaze with thoughts of loving bliss.
Added to glossary by
katerina turevich
Jul 21, 2014 10:31
9 yrs ago
Russian term
Germany
12+ Years in Legal, Business & Marketing
Native in: German (Variant: Germany)
Works in: Russian to German, English to German
Она в предчувствии любви (whole phrase)
Russian to English
Art/Literary
Poetry & Literature
romantic poem
The whole thing reads:
ЖЕНЩИНА
Она в предчувствии любви
Робость Нежность Перевоплощения Гордость Память
THE WOMAN
She is seized by the anticipation of love (Love?)
Timidity Tenderness Versatility Pride Memory
Who has an idea how to put this beautifully?
Thank you in advance!
ЖЕНЩИНА
Она в предчувствии любви
Робость Нежность Перевоплощения Гордость Память
THE WOMAN
She is seized by the anticipation of love (Love?)
Timidity Tenderness Versatility Pride Memory
Who has an idea how to put this beautifully?
Thank you in advance!
Proposed translations
(English)
Change log
Jul 22, 2014 20:26: katerina turevich Created KOG entry
Proposed translations
2 hrs
katerina turevich
Netherlands
Netherlands
Native in Russian
&
English
Works in field
Netherlands
attentive to detail and fast
Native in: English 
, Russian
Works in: Dutch to English, Russian to English
Related KudoZ points
:
13
Selected
Her mind ablaze with thoughts of loving bliss.
Woman.
Her heart ablaze with thoughts of loving bliss.
She turns/is at times timid, tender, pliable and proud,
She will remember everything she sees.
Yes, "pliable" for Перевоплощения
but it isn't really clear what the original tries to convey
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Note added at 3 hrs (2014-07-21 13:31:41 GMT)
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I meant, what the original tries to convey with this bizzare swith to singular nouns in the next line
Her heart ablaze with thoughts of loving bliss.
She turns/is at times timid, tender, pliable and proud,
She will remember everything she sees.
Yes, "pliable" for Перевоплощения
but it isn't really clear what the original tries to convey
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 3 hrs (2014-07-21 13:31:41 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
I meant, what the original tries to convey with this bizzare swith to singular nouns in the next line
Note from asker:
| Thank you, Katerina. I agree that either one should interpret a lot into the text, or leave it just as it is, as nouns. Your translation has helped me to understand the original sense better and shown me the right direction how to handle this. So I am rewarding you with the points. |
3 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
-1
20 mins
DILYAVER FAKHRIYEV
Türkiye
Türkiye
Native in Russian
Türkiye
Scrupulous and research-oriented
Native in: Russian
Works in: English to Russian, Turkish to Russian, Ukrainian to Turkish, and 1 more.
"in a tender grip of love foretaste is She"
добавил только tender в смысле в "нежных" объятиях. можете использовать без tender.
"И в объятиях нежных предвкушения любви Она (пребывает)"
"И в объятиях нежных предвкушения любви Она (пребывает)"
Peer comment(s):
| neutral |
LilianNekipelov
: Too much.
16 mins
|
| disagree |
The Misha
: This reads as machine translation, and it's a bit ungrammatical too.
11 hrs
|
|
it is not ungrammatical. It is Inverted sentence to add an emphasis, since this is a literary style. And it is not a machine translation either. I have a translation experience of more than 15 years and never used anything other than my own brain.
|
-1
14 mins
Andrey Svitanko
Poland
Poland
Native in Russian
Poland
RU EN UKR
Native in: Russian 
Works in: English to Russian, Russian to English, Ukrainian to English, and 8 more.
She is in a premonition of love
Проверьте точные совпадения
Но вообще по-русски так не говорят)
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Note added at 19 мин (2014-07-21 10:50:40 GMT)
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Вообще находятся точные совпадения
И anticipation of love, и pre-feeling of love...
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Note added at 24 мин (2014-07-21 10:55:44 GMT)
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Для Ромео и Джульетты перевод "предчувствие любви" обозначается как Вы и написали: "Anticipation of Love"
Пишут по-разному и где как...
Где-то с большой буквы Love, где-то с маленькой...
Но вообще по-русски так не говорят)
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 19 мин (2014-07-21 10:50:40 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Вообще находятся точные совпадения
И anticipation of love, и pre-feeling of love...
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 24 мин (2014-07-21 10:55:44 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Для Ромео и Джульетты перевод "предчувствие любви" обозначается как Вы и написали: "Anticipation of Love"
Пишут по-разному и где как...
Где-то с большой буквы Love, где-то с маленькой...
Note from asker:
| Thank you! |
Peer comment(s):
| agree |
LilianNekipelov
: 'in anticipation' might be better. You cannot translate poetry word for word--it does not matter what Dilvayer said below. it is also not true. "With the premonition' might be better..
24 mins
|
|
Thank you!
|
|
| disagree |
DILYAVER FAKHRIYEV
: Premonition используется для дурных предчувствий (беды, несчастья и т.п.)
30 mins
|
|
Вы пробейте точное совпадение "premonition of love", там куча совпадений! Ну и от себя добавлю, что не всегда для дурных. Для дурных предчувствий используется misgiving
|
|
| disagree |
The Misha
: Вообще по-английски так тоже не говорят
11 hrs
|
26 mins
Frank Szmulowicz, Ph. D.
United States
United States
Native in English
United States
On time, on target, on budget.
Native in: English , Polish
Works in: Polish to English, English to Polish, Russian to Polish, and 1 more.
Related KudoZ points
:
97
Her heart aflutter, its doors open, she waited for love to enter.
Personal experience.:)
28 mins
Ella Gokhmark
Australia
Australia
Native in Russian
&
English
Specializes in field
Australia
живое слово
Native in: Russian , English
Works in: English to Russian, Russian to English
She is eager to fall in love (on the verge of falling in love)
Немного уходящий в сторону вариант.
И еще я бы робость перевела как fear, а перевоплощения как transformations
И еще я бы робость перевела как fear, а перевоплощения как transformations
44 mins
LilianNekipelov
United States
United States
Native in English
Specializes in field
United States
Legal and literary translator. Linguist.
Native in: English (Variants: US, British) , Polish (Variant: Standard-Poland)
Works in: Russian to English, Polish to English, Swedish to English
Related KudoZ points
:
16
In the anticipation of love
I like this the most, so far
+1
5 hrs
Shelley Fairweather-Vega
Native in English
Specializes in field
The English you need
Native in: English (Variant: US)
Works in: Russian to English, Uzbek to English
Related KudoZ points
:
4
She stands draped in the anticipation of love
I see her wearing this anticipation, wrapped in it.
Note from asker:
| Thank you, a very beautiful solution! |
Peer comment(s):
| agree |
The Misha
: You can always tell who is a true native. Great metaphor too.
6 hrs
|
|
Thanks! And I'm glad you like the "stands."
|
|
| neutral |
katerina turevich
: I don't know. I can hardly imagine being 'draped in anticipation': "draped in a certain type of cloth in anticipation of a certain event’, perhaps. Or, it should be 'DRENCHED WITH anticipation': that would make more sense, in any case.
18 hrs
|
12 hrs
Anticipating love, she stands
Anticipating love, she stands,
A tender, timid creature
On the cusp of metamorphosis
And memory. And pride.
The woman.
Naturally, no one can be too sure here. It's not nuts and bolts, it's poetry. It either clicks, or it doesn't.
A tender, timid creature
On the cusp of metamorphosis
And memory. And pride.
The woman.
Naturally, no one can be too sure here. It's not nuts and bolts, it's poetry. It either clicks, or it doesn't.
Note from asker:
| Also very beautiful, thank you! |
18 hrs
Dmitriy Gromov
Russian Federation
Russian Federation
Native in Russian
Russian Federation
Переводчик, редактор, преподаватель
Native in: Russian (Variant: Standard-Russia)
Works in: English to Russian, Russian to English, German to Russian, and 1 more.
She looking forward to love
-
Discussion
Вильямом нашим Шекспиром.